Dear Jane Record Bunting

The most notable person in my life who had Jane in her name was my Grammy. She was born Betty Jane McInnes, and I can't say that I was ever super in-love with Jane because of its associations - plain Jane, Jane Doe, etc. - despite the fact that Calamity Jane was just about my first hero. Calamity Jane or Anne Shirley, I can't remember who entered my world first.

And then cute little you came along as a freshman in college when I was a junior. You were the first of my peers to bear the name Jane. At first I might have thought this was a mistake, surely this girl with so much spunk who could belch as loud as me (though I never did it as publicly as you - or publicly ever) wasn't "just a Jane."

While we were in Hawaii, you shared your middle name: Record - your mother's maiden name. Jane Record. You also declared your love for your name, and I loved it too.

About a week after I had Cora, my second daughter's name popped into my head while I was in the shower. Magnolia Jane McInnes. Fast forward a few years from that shower, and you can imagine my delight when I discovered I was having another girl and could use the name that was seemingly whispered in my ear. Her name was and is after my Grammy, but I don't know that I would have been so completely consumed by having Jane as part of her name if I didn't know you. The connection Jane has to my Grammy makes it sentimental and sweet, but you made me love the name itself.

I've enjoyed distantly keeping track of you over the last few years via facebook. The way you live your life and seize opportunities is contagious. When I look at my sweet little Magnolia Jane, there will likely always be something that reminds me of you. Thanks for wearing your name so well.

Jane Record Bunting

 [Katherine Love Photography]

Magnolia Jane McInnes Johnson

Betty Jane McInnes (Lund Lee)

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Our Garden, a Banana, and my thumb

I've covered our little garden up 5 times since I planted it because of freezing weather. It survived small hail. We lost a few plants, namely pumpkin, peppers, kale, and our carrots never came up. Aside from a rough beginning, it now seems to be growing by leaps and bounds every day. It makes me so happy.

 Broccoli, Cabbage, Brussels Sprouts, Sweet Peas, Beets

 Onions and Garlic

 Cute little sweet pea blossom

 Pea pod

 Tomato blossom. I thought our tomato plants were definitely goners. This gives me hope.

 Zucchini, summer squash, butternut squash, and okra in the top left corner.

 Salad greens

And this was the banana I cut up on my cereal this morning. I've never seen one that was super straight before. It needed to be documented. What's that you ask? Why yes, my left thumb is double jointed. 

See...

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♥

A devastating tornado hit Moore Oklahoma this afternoon. The destruction is hard to imagine, and I've only seen it on television. I can hardly wrap my mind around the scope of the damage. This tornado went from nothing, not a cloud in the sky, to an EF5 in less than an hour.  For now, I want to write down two specific stories that have completely touched my heart and overwhelmed me with gratitude, both tender mercies for people I love.

My friend Jennifer posted that her sister kept her daughter home from Plaza Towers Elementary School today. 

Another friend had her cousin pick her daughter up from her daycare when the tornado was on the ground. Her cousin called her at 3:08 to let her know she had her daughter. At 3:15 the tornado hit the daycare.

So far, all of my friends and family are safe. Some of their homes and/or cars are gone, but their lives are spared. I know what we're going to be doing later this week and weekend.

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Equality Run

We spent Mother's Day at the church Jake works at before heading down to his hometown for some birthday celebrations. One of the pastors is the Executive Director for Cimarron Alliance, and as he greeted me at the door, he said he'd heard I was running in the Equality Run (all of the proceeds go toward the Cimarron Alliance). I was caught off guard because I hadn't heard of the race, let alone signed up for it (Jake later said that he told Scott we'd put it on the calendar). I was glad it was now on my radar, and I registered for it when we got home later that evening.

I am so happy to get to participate in this run. Here's why:

Dear LGBT Brothers and Sisters,

When I spent one fall afternoon talking with Avery in front of the library at OCU, something really big inside me flipped around. I was on the fence about same-sex relationships. I didn't know that I cared much one way or the other.

Admittedly, I didn't shop at Walmart for months when I found out they were giving money to an organization for marriage equality. It's not a highlight, and the issue of marriage equality wasn't really the big deal, it was when I learned about how lobbyists and corporations work together, and I wanted to make sure I was spending money at a place that supported things I supported. When I was talking about this with the people I worked with in Financial Aid, one person stopped me in my tracks. It was Kerry Horst. She said, "Their relationships don't affect my marriage." She was right. And I love her for it.

Back to Avery. Her girlfriend, Carol, had just graduated from college in another state, and they'd moved in with one another. It was so nice talking to someone who knew exactly what I was feeling because being a newlywed wasn't very common in undergrad. I realized that her relationship was no different from mine. Everything we were experiencing about getting used to having someone around all the time, and not being able to concentrate on anything else because we were finally able to be with the person we loved more than any other was all the same. To me, Avery and Carol were "married."

When I got all of the super awesome forward emails before prop 8 passed, I was just so puzzled by them. The biggest argument was that teachers would be able to read stories that talk about families with gay and lesbian parents, and that was just "outrageous." My thoughts back were always, "What if one of your child's best friends happens to have two moms or two dads?" Feeling like it's outrageous to learn about all kinds of families is like pretending some kinds of families don't exist, but they do, and they are important. This year, one of Cora's best friends at school has two moms. They are incredible, and do an amazing job with their children. And as far as children being "damaged" by same gender parents, the thing that is most damaging is when their family isn't validated - when they feel that they are less than - when they are told their family is wrong. Our society is damaging. The most important thing for children, whether they're raised by a mom and dad, same gender parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, their neighbors, is that they are loved and have a sense of security. I've yet to meet a same gender couple who wasn't providing just that for their children. Their family is not less than my family.

I'm running for my cousin Charlie, who was the first one to come out in our crazy gigantic almost all Mormon family.

For my brother-in-law and the life he wants to build with the one he loves.

For Anthony Livolsi who bravely came out after years of struggling with who he was.

For Pam and Melinda - two Mormon women who both served missions and later found one another. They left several years ago because they knew their relationship and Mormonism wouldn't really work together. They now attend Church of the Open Arms (where Jake works), and I met them on Sunday. They are fantastic, and I can't imagine what they've gone through to protect and nurture one another.

For all of you because who you are is valuable to me. The relationships you work to build are important to me. And the love you share makes the world a better place.

Love,
BrieAnn

If any of you would like to join me at the equality run, you still have plenty of time to register. It's on June 29th at 8AM at Lake Hefner's Stars and Stripes Park. They have a 5k and 10k. Come and run or walk, and if any of you happen to see some rainbow knee high socks, will you pick them up for me? ;)

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Potty Training - Day 1

The end of the day was better than the beginning. That's progress.

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Whirlwind

After spending many many hours over the course of two days at car dealerships, we became a two car family on Saturday. The first experience at the dealership had a really bad outcome. Like the worst ever full of way too many discrepancies in the price we were being told and what was listed on-line compared to what we faced when we got to the final step. We walked away from the deal and the cute little Volvo C30. I didn't even feel bad about it (except for how fun the car was).

Later that evening I went to the Honda dealership we got our fit from  because I saw an Accord I was interested in. The Accord had sold earlier in the day, but on the lot was a Toyota Prius. I have been in-love with this 50+ mpg car since it first came out, despite its boxy futuristic exterior (which I now find quite endearing), but they're always just beyond our budget with low miles, and way too many miles when we can afford them. This one was different. All the cars on lot, both new and used, had varying degrees of hail damage. You know what that means, right? Wait for it....

We got one hail of a deal. ;)

We love everything about it so far. Her/his name is still pending. We had a great experience (again) at Bob Howard Honda.

And purchasing the Prius is what led to this evening. I thought, since we now have the versatility of the Prius, perhaps we could trade Olive (our Outback) for something with a lower monthly payment now that we have more than one car. We found another Accord we really liked, went and test drove it, and really really liked it. The payment couldn't get right where we wanted it to be, but we weren't budging one bit. Why? I'll tell you in a second. There was a 2011 Outback on the lot with black interior. This is important because I pretty much hate the ivory interior of ours. Whatever the extra money would have been to go with leather would have been worth it. The 2011 Outback was even manual, which Jake has been wanting. We thought we could do more of a trade, still have an Outback but a lower monthly payment. It worked out that the lower monthly payment was on our side with that Outback, but here's the deal: We LOVE Olive - even with her seats that are a nightmare with kids. And even us, and we don't even eat in it, but the front seats look like we eat greasy drippy really stain-y things all the time. We drove home in the car we came in, and I'm glad. I even kissed her steering wheel on the way out of the dealership and sang her love ballads on the way home. We're going to have Olive detailed and her seats scotch guarded, and if that doesn't seem to do the trick, we'll invest in some seat covers. I LOVE OUR OUTBACK! (But if you think you'll love one too, remember either leather or dark cloth.)

I hope all goes as planned and that we end up passing the two cars we have now to our girls when they get old enough to drive. ;)  I don't really want to drive into a car dealership for at least a decade. Now we just need to sell Scoot, our scooter.

And with all the car buying and keeping excitement out of the way, tomorrow is the day that our 3-day potty training method session begins with Magnolia. It begins in the morning with her getting to pick up the princess potty she picked out from Target. Cora was SOOO easy in the transition from diapers to panties. I know it might not work that way with Magnolia, but I am just so happy about the idea of being done with diapers that I can't wait for tomorrow to get here. We also turned her car seat around today. Huge step!

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Thoughts and NKH Awareness Day.

This evening, I went to the grocery store after Jake got home. When I was leaving home, I looked at the clock: 8:45. I had time to run by the library before it closed at 9:00 to grab some books I had on reserve.  When I got back in the car, an old episode of This American Life was on NPR. The title of the show was Music Lessons. I caught part of the second act, and I stayed in my car for almost 10 minutes after I got to Whole Foods to finish listening to the third act. It was that good. Ann Lamott was telling a story of an airplane ride, and comparing it to miracles. In the middle of the airplane story, she talks about a miracle taking place at her church. It was very beautiful, and I think a good example of how we can all come into our own and into the "greater whole" through finding out how to care for and love others. You can listen to it here. The miracle at church story is probably somewhere near the middle of the third act called Knockin' on Heaven's Door, but the whole act is really fantastic.

My birthday is on Friday. I will be 28. This doesn't seem to be one of those super pause and reflect on the number I'm carrying around with me years. 27 was one of those. It was a no turning back year. I've been thinking about how my mom has randomly been with me on my birthday every year since 2007, but won't be here this year.

2007: College graduation (We graduated on Cinco de Mayo, two days after my birthday).
2008: Cora's blessing. My mom came back to help for two weeks (she came for three right after Cora was born) to fill the gap between me going back to work and Jake getting out of school for summer. At the end of the two weeks, we blessed Cora. Lots of family was here for the blessing. We went to Cattlemen's for dinner. I stood on the seat of our booth, while three booths of people I love sang me happy birthday. A kind stranger gave me ten dollars as he was leaving.
2009: Mom and Don both came to visit. I got sick in the middle of the their stay. Lots of barf.
2010: We lived in Chicago and they were there visiting.
2011: My great aunt and uncle passed away within a few days of one another, and their family held a memorial service for them when the weather warmed up, and it just happened to be a few days before my birthday. My Aunt Kristin, Uncle David, Grammy, and my little family ate dinner and went bowling.
2012: My mom came just for fun. She crazy spoiled me with all kinds of shopping. And a mani/pedi where I discovered my favorite nail color: Big Apple Red.
2013: My parents just started building a house. I guess it's okay to take a back seat. ;)

This year Jake has numerous rehearsals on the actual day so I don't think I'll really get to see him, and he's leaving REALLY early the day after to go to Nebraska for a Tuba conference. You read that right. Tuba conference. Nebraska. He'll be back REALLY late Saturday night - maybe early Sunday morning. Cora's dance recital is on Saturday, so it will be fun getting to and from the dress rehearsals and performances via bike trailer. (He's taking Olive - our car.)

Tonight I was thinking about my best friend from high school, Sarah Keller. She used to sometimes think the Burger King sign in our hometown (Apache Junction, AZ) was the moon. It really did look like the moon sometimes. I think the Devon Tower looks like the moon when the top is lit up. I'd love to sit and stargaze with her like we did one evening in the back of Trudy (her sister's truck). I'll love that night I spent with her for as long as I'm alive.

I registered for a class this summer and for a few more this fall. This summer I'm taking Human Anatomy and Physiology I, and this fall I'm taking Human Anatomy and Physiology II, Chem I, and Physics. I'm really excited. Not just because these classes were nowhere on the radar of an English major (what I was in college), but I think it will be fun to be in a formal learning setting again (minus the whole figuring out child care and what-not). I graduated from college in three years. Really, it was two-and-a-half because my last semester was student teaching. How? Major overload. I took 20+ hours some semesters. One semester, I had 13 papers left to write, and only 10 days before finals. It was kind of crazy, but it worked. I wanted to graduate the same time Jake did so we could go off and do his graduate work wherever that might be (he ended up getting his masters in Oklahoma!). I wish I would have taken more time, studied more things that I was interested in. I wanted to minor in photography and art history, but there wasn't enough time. I was also double majoring in education, so really, I didn't have many electives, especially in five semesters. I think it will be fun to see where these classes take me...or where I take these classes.

I'm also thinking about how May 2 is NKH (Non-ketotic Hyperglycinemia) Awareness Day. This disease affects less than 500 children worldwide, so there isn't a great deal of money going toward research. This is a shame. Researchers feel hopeful that it can be cured. And I say 500 children rather than people because NKH takes the lives of children before they're able to grow up. I've written about Ellie Kate McLaughlin before. She passed away right before Christmas at seven years old. It was a miracle that she lived so many years. NKH is a genetic disorder, and Ellie Kate's little sister, Lucy, also has it. Lucy is currently in the hospital, and just a few days ago took a very scary turn after surgery. She is doing much better, but the fact is, NKH will take her life as well. Lucy and Ellie Kate belong to an amazing family. Their parents fight for them. They also have two sons without the disorder, but they are greatly affected by having two sisters who have been so ill. While we may not be able to donate monetarily to the NKH cause, we can donate a little bit of time and educate ourselves about what some families are going through. We can lift these families, and all families with special needs up in prayer. Learn more about NKH by going here: NKH Crusaders.

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