Running with Alice

I really want to try to be in bed by 10 and get up before I'm brought out of those amazing early morning dreams by calls from my girls' room that they need to go potty or they're hungry or, "IT'S MORNING!" It's currently 11:22. I will try with all my might to make it to bed by 10 tomorrow night.

After my girls were in bed, I went for my first run with Alice.
1. Alice is mostly a pretty slow runner.
2. When she's startled, she's a really fast, all over the place runner.
3. Alice stops a lot to sniff this and that.
4. She is an abrupt stopper.
5. I only almost tripped once. Make that twice.
6. Alice was a nice distraction from running.

I ran about two miles tonight because I didn't want to take Alice out for too long. When I got home, I contemplated going back out for a moonlight bike ride because the weather was perfect. Is this turning into another running post? It might be.

I gained 6-8 pounds in Arizona. No joke. My parents had a never ending supply of Peanut Butter M&M's on their kitchen counter, and those were just one of the many things I indulged in while there. I eat my way through familiar places. So now I have the weight of an average newborn human being residing on me. Mostly in my midsection. Orange Beach and a swimsuit were a slice of humble pie. I'm short, and short people know that every pound counts.

So I'm running. Here's the deal about running: I've run three races since April. [10k on a relay team for the Memorial Marathon, 5k Downtown Dash, 5k Equality Run.] Do you know how many times I've gone running since February besides tonight?

Go on and take a guess....

Three. Besides tonight I have gone running three times since February. Did you add that up? Let me help if you still have your fingers out: The only running I've done in the last six months have been during my three races. I don't get it either. I'm about to get philosophical. I think.

I really want to love running. And sometimes I really do. Like when I ran the Downtown Dash. And when I ran tonight. And I used to love running all the time. Like when I was young (even before my cross-country days in high school), and I would run around the track for fun while my mom walked with a friend. And the first time I ran two miles in 7th grade. 8 laps around the dirt track at Kino Jr. High during gym class. I was naturally a "good" runner. I didn't have to work hard at it. That was also a stumbling block....

Sometimes the things you're naturally good at aren't the things you love. And sometimes you never do things you [would] really love because of the work they require.

I know that my body would do whatever I wanted it to in the running arena if I put in the effort. But my mind is always like, "Ugh! Why all the repetitive motion?" And I almost always let my mind win. So what does this really mean? Something I wish wasn't a part of me. I'm naturally good at many things, but I find ways out when it comes to putting the work in at things that could be super rewarding. I stay at the baseline of my ability. I think this is why 1/2 marathon/marathon remain on my list of things to do. Because doing them will mean overcoming this mental block I have when it comes to running. But it's not just running. This mental block that extends to many parts of my life. I'm just about over it.

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